Remember the walking nightmare that was Puppy Monkey Baby? Brazil has something far worse. It’s Drunky Monkey Knifey. A monkey in Brazil was seen sneaking sips of bar goers drinks that had contents of a distilled spirit called cachaça. After throwing them back the monkey chased all of the males in the bar with a foot long knife. However the monkey was gentlemanly enough to let the women be. However I’m sure they were slightly less at peace than usual, and were glued to this mayhem.
The monkey was detained by the fire department, one staffer recapped the event, “It was a bar staff oversight that ended with the monkey drinking some rum and taking the knife.” But this still leaves one burning question: Why does this bar have a foot long knife? Pubs in the UK can’t even have glass cups to keep bar brawls to a safe minimum. So why does Brazil bars need a machete? Possibly to keep the drunk monkeys out… but then that plan did not go over well at all.
The monkey was released to an environmental reserve but was later removed again after he was scaring some of the children who lived nearby.
In a video posted to YouTube Wednesday you can see the monkey stabbing the roof of the bar.